GK: A fresh start is a beautiful thing

The Column: 08.27.21

Kathy Hochul took over as governor of New York on Tuesday and so far as I can see nobody said a single bad thing about her all week. In fact, the advance press was entirely favorable, about her extensive experience in local government, her good work habits, her love of getting out and meeting constituents and hearing their complaints. And, it must be added, nobody complained that she had laid a hand on them in a way that made them uncomfortable. It was extraordinary, a politician nobody is furious at. This is big news, people.

She’s from upstate and so to New York City residents, she is a complete mystery, as a Martian would be or a Mennonite, and this seems like a chance for everyone to get a fresh start and focus on the environment, health care, education, public safety, rather than the inappropriateness of commenting on a woman’s outfit. For years Governor Hochul served as an anonymous lieutenant governor to a man who hogged the stage, sang, danced, conducted the band, a man for whom public attention was oxygen. And then in short order he became a man whom people were thoroughly tired of reading about, or reading about anything that sounded like him, such as glaucoma, homogeneity, or combovers. When she took over, it was a huge relief.

A fresh start: it’s a basic necessity in life. I wake up in the morning, put my bare feet on the floor, and think, “The dumb things I did yesterday, forgetting my credit card at the restaurant, cursing my computer for not accepting my PIN, I shall not repeat today. I was cranky yesterday. I shall be agreeable starting now.”

This is a function of jokes: they’re a way to change the subject. Your dinner companions get stuck on the subject of health insurance and the conversation heads deeper into the actuarial swamp and so you tell the joke about the man and his wife who crash into the bridge abutment and die and go to heaven and it’s beautiful and he says, “You know, if you hadn’t gotten me on blood thinners, I could’ve been here ten years ago.” It’s an old joke but it breaks the gridlock and now maybe we can talk about bridges instead. People get fixated on politics and you’re dying of boredom and you say, “How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb? One to hold onto the bulb and two thousand to turn the building.”

We need some freshness in politics. The cast of characters has been around half my life, the rhetoric is old as the granite hills, our leaders are phoning it in. The country seems divided 50-50 and so it takes forever to get basic stuff done and the sniping is ferocious and politicians don’t dare exhibit humor in public. Jokes have become dangerous.

I like Joe, he doesn’t lust for attention. He doesn’t wear heavy makeup and he doesn’t pose in front of churches, he actually goes in. Sometimes he sits at his desk and works. If he’s been playing golf, it must’ve been late at night. He’s got a sense of humor because he’s Irish and he’s from Delaware, a state of one million with two U.S. senators, a joke played by the Founders, a poke in the ribs of New York and Massachusetts. He’s a good one-term guy. Not two. We need to turn the page.

Afghanistan was a disaster we inherited from old imperialists and most Americans will be glad not to be reading about it on a daily basis. The Taliban is a bunch of thugs, nobody you’d want to move in upstairs, and they captured the flag, and now it’s their problem. If they want to restore the Middle Ages, good luck, but all of their best people are trying to escape. A Kalashnikov is no substitute for brains.

Kamala Harris has been staying in the background, a wise move, and I can imagine in 2023, after the Democrats survive 2022, Mr. Biden, having accomplished what he can, will announce that he’s too busy to think about another campaign, and Ms. Harris will step forward. As a woman of color, she would have an opportunity to put some bitter issues to the side and lead us into an era of good feeling. My generation is done: throw the bums out and let’s get down to business. If she’s not up for it, maybe Governor Hochul is.

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For those of you in Eastern Minnesota/Western Wisconsin or if you are eager for a little weekend getaway, Prudence Johnson, Dan Chouinard and I will be performing in Ladysmith and Menomonie, WI on Sept 11 and 12th. BUY TICKETS (While you are on the event page, checkout other offerings in Pennsylvania, Georgia, North Carolina and Virginia).