Post to the Host

Comments from the Week of 02.05.23

We are coming to the show in Omaha on March 4. Is there any way Garrison can sing the song about Nebraska? Everybody loves the song about the fish that he did in the ’90s. It has been such a special thing to our family. My mom taught it to my kids. She passed away in 1999.

Darcy Hinrichsen

O Nebraska, I love your rivers
Away you Nishnabotna
The Niobrara, and Arikaree
Red Willow Creek and the Big Nemaha
And a river that you can imagine why they named it, a river called the Dismal

There is a river called the Republican
And it starts in Colorado
Flows through Kansas and Nebraska
It is straight, extremely straight
Though it bends slightly to the right it goes exactly where it is heading

The Papillion was named by Frenchmen
A river named in honor of a butterfly
Frenchman Creek was probably not
Who but the French could cross the plains and be impressed by the sight of a butterfly. 

Every creek and river has a story
Whiskey Run and Silver Creek, 
White River, perhaps named by Indians because it was crooked
And Calamus River, named for an herb, a wetlands herb, that resembles the iris. 

But eventually they ran out of names
They sat down by yet one more river
All the good names had already been taken
It was a small river and it was fairly blue and so they named it the Little Blue River. 

I sang that to the tune of Shenandoah. Or are you thinking of another song? Happy to oblige. GK

Little Blue River

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Dear Garrison,

Back in the early 1980s I lived in West Africa, and friends mailed cassette tapes of your radio shows to me. I listened to your show while lying in bed under mosquito netting, sweating, far back in the rain forest. You made me homesick for ice fishing, snowstorms, Midwestern food, coffee shops, and my people, the Dutch settlers in NW Iowa and W Michigan. I’m paying attention to you more and more again. I’m avoiding the news and politics. And lately, when others bring these things up, I tell them that I’m more at peace with the world, and cheerful since I don’t follow the news and politics as much. Some people seem let down that I don’t take a side and want to debate with them. It’s very liberating for me.

Pete

It’s an old man’s view of the world, to avoid anguish over things you cannot change. I donate money to relief organizations helping people in Syria and Turkey but I don’t read the horrible stories in the paper. I have friends and family who need my attention and I want to create entertainment and do shows, a useful contribution to the world. I know people who’ve spent years loathing a particular politician and what did it gain them? I also know people who tutor high school students having problems with English composition, a useful thing and much much more interesting. GK

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Good morning!

I just read Garrison’s column 02/08/23. The photo at the foot of the page ... is that Wabash, Indiana? I am an interested Hoosier, now residing in St. John, Indiana, located on the northwestern corner of the state. The courthouse in the photo looked familiar, so I thought I would ask.

Your Beth Friend

Indeed, that is the Wabash courthouse. I did a show in Wabash and loved the audience and admired the town. GK

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Mr. Keillor,

When will you do more of those revival shows? I enjoyed watching one on the livestream but would love to see it in person. And would it be the same show, or are all the shows different? Please come to Seattle or nearby.

Jason

Seattle, Washington

I don’t see any PHC revivals on my calendar but I suppose there will be more, perhaps in 2024 for the 50^th anniversary. It’s an expensive show to do, what with the large cast and the cost of airfare, and we don’t have the means to advertise it, and then of course there’s the fact that the audience has dwindled to a fraction. Meanwhile, I’m having a wonderful time doing small shows in small towns. I did one the other night in Springfield, Missouri, and they sang “America” and “Going to the Chapel” and “How Great Thou Art” a cappella so that it made me weep. Plus the News from Lake Wobegon. GK 

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GK,

Your recent columns have been more lighthearted, and I must say that I appreciate that. I’m guessing this is an intentional decision. You mentioned that your job is to make us laugh, and I agree that this is your calling. We all read about political division, war, crime, and other disasters daily and don’t need more of this. To be eighty and to be able to find the lovely things in life is highly admirable.

Charlotte

Thank you, Charlotte. The beauty of being 80 is that you realize more fully how fortunate you are. Morbid gloom belongs to the young. When I was 50 I met my wife and that changed everything. A fortunate marriage is almost all a person needs, that plus sturdy good health due to the correct choice of parents. GK

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Hello, Mr. Keillor.

I just read your February 8th column about having friends in different circles of different ages. I’m performing in an all-female version of Lord of the Flies with cast members much younger than I.  Admittedly, I don’t understand a lot of their cultural references, but we have a lot more in common than I thought. They are vibrant, engaging, friendly, inclusive, and fun! They are some of the hardest-working people I’ve ever met. Many of them are full-time students working more than one job and somehow find time to act! The youngest, a 16-year-old wakes up at 5:30 every morning, goes to school, works at a bakery, and then comes to rehearsal after work. There is an aspiring school counselor, future politician, talented artist, mathematician, and musician in the group. I truly hope when our play closes we will all remain friends. Intergenerational friendships are the best!

Kelly

Spokane, Washington

Glad to hear it. I envy your good luck finding your way into their circle. I don’t see a way for myself, but I do have an ambitious grandson and some interesting great-nieces. I’m not a good teacher, which closes off one avenue. And after decades of sitting solo in a small room and writing, I don’t have much in the way of social skills. GK

Lord of the Flies - all female cast, London.

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Hi, GK the DJ! 

I asked ChatGPI to write a poem about Garrison Keillor and in five seconds it responded with this …

“Write a poem about Garrison Keillor.”

Garrison Keillor, a name so grand,
A storyteller, a master of the land,
With words that flow, like a gentle stream,
Takes us to a world, of wit and dream.

His voice, deep and rich, like warm maple syrup,
Paints vivid scenes, in our mind’s eye, so sharp,
Of Lake Wobegon, where all is serene,
And we laugh and smile, at its simple routine.

He weaves tales of love, and life, and strife,
Of folks, who are just like us, in their everyday life,
Their struggles and joys, their laughter and tears,
Bringing us closer, to our own fears.

So let us sit back, and listen with glee,
To the voice of Keillor, as he sets our spirit free,
Taking us on journeys, far beyond our sight,
Filling our hearts, with love and delight.

So here’s to Keillor, a true bard of the air,
A storyteller, beyond compare,
May he continue to spin his tales, with grace,
And keep us entertained, in this ever-changing place.

Mike

A poem written by ChatGPI
Has no wherefore and no why,
No motivation, no real basis,
Just clichés and commonplaces. 
A machine for creating tedium,
A few little beeps and a steady hum. 

GK