38 Comments

"...life is pretty good and could be worse but even if bad things happen there is a great deal of kindness in the world." That is a much better message to start my morning with than those political headlines that are trying to grab my attention. I've started listening to music during my morning commute instead of NPR - which I love and support - but I can't fix everything and it's just too frustrating that the truth doesn't seem to matter to half of our population. I sing on my way to teaching young children and arrive in a much better frame of mind. Thanks for your perspective and insights - I love having you back in my life.

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Since my wife of 55-1/2 years passed away 6 years ago, Maine Classical on Maine Public Radio keeps me company. I get my news and weather from my local NBC TV station and occasional NPR 5-minute news slots.

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A pleasant morning reading your prose is the way I spend each morning. You warm my heart and make me smile!

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GK,

Good piece. You made me laugh and caused me to read some portions of it to my wife.

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I’m with you GK. I choose to dwell on the good things which , by the way, I find to be in plentiful supply. And that’s the trick, isn’t it? To stop for a moment, look around, and realize our lives are littered with good things. Credit to actor Michael J Fox, who boiled down his attitude in dealing with health issues by saying “It’s a choice.” He is so right.

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This Lutheran boy from Northern Minnesota has experienced a good share of life right along with you.

Maybe that's what drew me to PHC every Saturday. We Lutherans revel in playing the ain't it awful game while accepting that we are saved, so why worry. We also enjoy frugality. A few years ago I thought what the heck, I'm not flying coach again, and I'm not staying in two star hotels or driving cars that I once thought were above my state. Nope, closing in on eighty puts a whole new take on things. Yes, life is good. My dear wife and I also do our best to make the lives of othes better. It's what Lutherans do. Thanks for the affirmation.

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And Lutherans also sing like angels. I know, I was there.

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Yes we do.

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Garrison, You speak the truth about getting older and choosing. Thank you D

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The Rapture is not part of my tradition, and that's a good thing. If you were to be raptured, leaving all the rest of us behind, just when most needed, that would be a pity.

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The Rapture is not part of my philosophy either (I'd probably get left behind). Big money maker for Kirk Cameron and the Rapture syndicate.

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L.A. does something to(for) you! what a marvelous piece! Canyonlessness!!!! don't drink, just enjoy.

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If your intention was to make a joke about emotionally distant fathers, you missed the mark. If you were intending to state a fact about Minnesota fathers, you are just plain mistaken. I know countless Minnesota men of my and your generation who are engaged, doting and expressive fathers. And among my son’s generation, it is even more evident. Despite the shortcomings of our own fathers and grandfathers, change is happening.

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He may have missed your mark. He hit mine, though. .500 !

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I stand corrected.

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You know, it seems you're always going to piss off somebody. (Am I allowed to say piss off here?)

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Nice trick there with the subjunctive mood. It's as if you were a gifted rhetorician.

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Ah yes, the subjunctive tense, automatic in German, not so much in English.

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Ahhhh.....Wisdom clothed in Humor. My Cuppa Tea! Thanks, buddy.

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I remember going to the movies as a kid, and Roy Rogers gunshot barely missed me as he fought the bad guys. Life has been good since.

Sandy R.

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Thanks for confessing! It’s a relief to know that others stand there with a spatula in hand – or maybe we’re hand-surfing under the sudsy water in the sink, and suddenly forget what’s the object of our desires???

As to Shakespeare – perhaps you’ve been on the stage at the Old Globe Theatre in Balboa Park, San Diego? If so, you’ll remember the extraordinary “Open air” setting, with eucalyptus trees on a grassy slope just behind the “boards.” Was it “Romeo and Juliet” when the star-crossed lover ran around, physically pinning love notes to the tree trunks, elated with his love for her? It was King Lear, I’m pretty sure, that got the most elaborate set! The title actor appeared on stage, coming up a ramp from behind the stage on a pony-drawn sleigh. It was a night-time performance. Lights caught bushels and bushels of tiny white paper, creating a “weather event” previously unknown in San Diego – a snowstorm!

As to the spatula, though, cheer up! You know it’s a spatula! But in terms of the front seat, I once had the chance to be seated in the way, way, way back! I was next to the projection booth, which had a nice glass door. Half the time, I’d be watching the projectionist “playing the soundboard” with all the skill of Liberace! (Oops! I was going to say Van Cliburn, but the one time I attended a program, he’d stand at the piano and bring his hands crashing down on the keys. I was an usher at the time – and I remember the half-hour “extra Intermission” that was necessary to get a piano tuner in there and pamper the tortured ivories!

As for the reflexive pronoun and the subjunctive moods, relax! When I attended an Pentecostal Ukrainian Church, with most of the sermons in Russian, folks there endeavored to set me at ease. Russian has three genders and six cases, all singular and plural – an absolutely distracting set of endings, and reflexive verbs to tag, and prefixes too, to choose from. It makes a difference if you say “the bird sits in the tree” – incorrect – or if you say “Sits on the tree”, you pass. I had had a few elementary Russian classes, so I had some working vocabulary, but every time I stood up in our evening open discussion meetings, I’d hear loads of hissing and mumbling from the folks around me. They were automatically correcting my gender, case and number, and whatever else I had stumbled on. [At the same time, after service, very often some of the women would come up to me and say “Way to go, Sister Susannah!” in Russian. There was one deacon in particular that no one else was brave enough to stand up and contradict. His wife sometimes would almost have tears of gratitude in her eyes – that I hadn’t let him castigate the young teenage women sitting facing us in the choir for letting their knees show – or some other “Indecency” in his “The Old Country” opinion. New World vs. Old! ]

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I took two years of Russian in college, so I appreciate your comments about the language! We had a wonderful woman from Moscow as our professor. She was very demanding and somewhat intimidating, but was an excellent teacher and we loved her. This was in the late 1960s, so we were curious about her life in Soviet Russia, but she was rarely willing to talk about it. It seemed like she was still afraid that the KGB was listening. Unfortunately, she disappeared a few weeks before the end of our 4th semester - the rumor was that she had some type of reproductive system cancer. I never found out what happened to her.

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Good morning. Your column always, no matter your focus, a morning treat along with that first cup of coffee. As a former high school English teacher, mentions of grammar, tense, syntax are always of interest. Though away from the classroom for a few years, my inner editor remains active. Reading along thoroughly enjoying this piece when you mention the subjunctive mood and then you throw in an “if I were.” I love it!!! So very clever.

Thank you for continuing to present uplifting, hopeful writing in these tumultuous time.

Pam Cavanagh, Arcata, California.

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I learned more about grammar (including the subjunctive mood) by studying foreign languages than I ever did in English classes. I went through an excellent school system (Concord, MA), but the teachers all seemed to think that someone else had, or was going to teach us about grammar, or that we would learn it by osmosis. Everything became clear when I took Latin in high school.

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Even before I tool a foreign language (not until college). I was told the best way to learn English is to take a foreign language.

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Twenty years from now, twenty months from now, twenty days from now, if you’re sober, it will most likely bring you right back to the day you stopped and then some. It’s been thirty-eight years for me, and every once in a while I tell myself that if I make it into my nineties I’ll shake (not stir) myself up a Bombay gin martini, hold the vermouth, with three olives in a chilled glass. But then I figure, “Why wreck a good record?” My dad was a gem who died too soon and my mother, who is still thriving in her eighties, takes pleasure in making others miserable. But that’s beside the point. I’m an alcoholic because I drank too much and almost killed a family in a station wagon driving drunk on Montauk Highway one night. Sometimes I miss those basements with foil lined paper ashtrays, styrofoam cups, instant coffee and powdered creamer. I was told when I first started going to keep my ears open and my mouth shut. I did everything that was recommended for five years, which laid a solid foundation, and then I stopped going but always remembered the basics. When I drink I lose control, and I apologize whenever I’m wrong on the spot. I still ask God for help and He delivers.

I also know that just about anywhere in the world I can find an AA meeting if I need one for a touch up. Lots of them in Unitarian church basements just about anywhere in the U.S.

Thank God I got sober. If I hadn’t, I would not have realized that there really is a lot of good and kindness in the world, and that blessings are abundant. Like sitting in First Class and not having the kid behind you kicking the back of your seat.

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Tess, you wrote this so beautifully--it's fresh, clear and present. You should have your own column.

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Thanks Jeannine. I appreciate that. I actually just published a book, “Rearview Mirror” by Tess Clayton which is available on Amazon. It’s a wild retrospective ride which you might enjoy. I’m working on my second book now, “Are We There Yet?”

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Well said.

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