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Your stories are a wonderful way to begin the day. I read today's column before finishing breakfast - in fact, it's still waiting for me as I write this letter. For me, there isn't much that wins out before breakfast, so that is high praise!

It's good to learn where the emergency supplies are stored. At least now you'll know where the toilet paper is tucked away (if there's ever next time). My husband recently spent 45 minutes searching the kitchen for basil, only to finally discover that I'd accidentally put it into the medicine cabinet instead of the herb cupboard. I didn't remember the incident, but I realize that I do things like this fairly often these days (and luckily, my husband's memory still functions properly!). I'd read that menopause can sometimes cause this sort of memory lapse, and it looks like it's true for me. I've started using labels, sticky notes, and piles of to-do lists. I remember a wise man once saying, "It could be worse." :)

My eldest son once put a bean up his nose, but he was only two years old. He waited until the doctor's office had closed for the day before commensing this experiment - when we were unable to extract the bean ourselves, we called the hospital and were told to bring him to the emergency room. I wish I'd thought to bring him to the playground instead so he could have had the fun of whirling the bean out as did your friend from eighth grade, but he enjoyed the adventure anyway. We had a very long wait. A hyperactive toddler with a bean stuck up his nose is obviously a lower priority than someone with a broken arm or a case of appendicitis, so we waited patiently. Our son spent the entire time energetically hopping up and down on the emergency room gurney, until the bean suddenly popped out and flew across the room, to be retrieved and placed into a specimen cup for the doctor. Our son then continued to use the gurney as a trampoline until the doctor finally had a chance to examine him. Apparently our son had provided great entertainment for the staff.The doctor couldn't stop laughing, but assured us that the bean had caused no serious harm. He also promised that there would be no charge because our son had done all the work by himself.

Thank you, Mr. Keillor, for stirring up happy memories!

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I was doing so well reading along, even after Mr. Menken's slap in my face with the quote that cut close to home with my bloody always constant IDEALISM , ( why would one start a women's theater group in a town of 85 if not idealistic - bahaha ) . But there it was... at the end... that song I remember hearing on the show . The one that reminded me of me at 7 sticking 2 lima beans up my nose when some had fallen out the edge of a split bag at the A & P . My Brit mother known for curiosity and adventure said in her Yorkshire lilt , "Catherine , why would you do such a bloody thing ?" Thank heavens for doctors and toilet paper both . And sprinkles of idealism ...

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"Beans in my Ears" - a popular song in my family's house from my childhood: https://youtu.be/kO8iZIVZmsU

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Apparently I did not hear this in my home and I would have said - well no mention of nose ... thanks for this , Jeannine ! baha !

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Read an opinion piece in the NYT. The guy said: "We have gotten to the point that the only qualifications for public office is the complete absence of any qualifications.

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"I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie. I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave. And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.” I'm not a politically-smart person, but I know that I would be willing to vote for someone who truly believed that statement.

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me too, but I think you misunderstood the sarcasm of Mencken. Elected officials have become the least type people that we need

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I deeply appreciate the gift of your musings each morning. They are typically read while I'm having breakfast, though there are occasions (like this morning), when I'm laughing so hard that eating and drinking coffee are impossible. There's nothing better, though, than a healthy "belly-laugh" to start one's day.

Today's musing struck a chord with me, as the past 18 months have been a blur of putting our house on the market, selling said house, moving to another house (a Victorian - mostly renovated), finishing the renovation, unpacking and finding "places" for all of our things.....all during a pandemic. I'm "of an age" when unpacking a box of things and putting them away doesn't necessarily mean I'll remember where I put them a week from now (or even tomorrow, for that matter). When planning our bedroom/bath with the architect, though, I did have the presence of mind to request a cabinet directly beside the toilet, precisely for the purpose of storing towels, spare toiletries and, yes, toilet paper. I can't tell you the number of times I've been grateful for the fact that, when I need it most, a spare roll is ALWAYS within reach.

Both my husband and I have been listening to you, in one form or another (PHC, on The Writer's Almanac, and sometimes in person at a concert) since the '70's. Through you we've discovered artists we love, your stories entertained our boys on long car rides, and then there are those belly-laughs! Thanks for all those memories.

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It was my pleasure and I'm always surprised to find out that other people were listening.

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5.21.21 column:

This is one is a joy to read! The humor is there, and I can hear your voice. It could be a short monologue on APHC. I didn't know H. L. was THAT conservative. But as you point out..."Idealism — not materialism — is the chief curse of the world. People get into trouble by taking their visions and hallucinations too seriously.” You can argue with that, and you should, but the clarity is admirable.

Phil Luecke

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A bidet is the solution...a part of the throne revolution. Fewer trees are fallen, fewer calls to the plumber and a cleaner king and throne for certain.

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I love your columns and can imagine your voice when I read them. I read them to my husband-not that he can't read them for himself, but he likes to listen to them being read. We did laugh at your predicament as my husband doesn't have a clue where things are in the house.

As Scots we were interested in you mentioning Scottish Independence. All I can say is, would you like to be ruled by Boris Johnston?! Just the latest in a long list of Prime Ministers from a party that Scots haven't voted to be in power since the 1950s. I hope for Scotland to be free before I'm too old, I'm 69 and my husband 73 so haven't got that much time to waste being angry all the time...

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I don't bother with Boris. Here in America, a guy named Boris wouldn't stand a chance to run for mayor of a small town. To us, it's a Rooshen name and we don't elect them. No Vladimirs either. We got us a Joe and he's good enough.

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