18 Comments
User's avatar
Anne French's avatar

Oh those coyotes! And the dogs, harnessed to humans. How delightful.

Nothing wrong with limericks if done with aplomb. Especially impressed by your two rhymes for Vancouver. (Mind you, Toronto rhymes with wanna and gonna in the local accent. Unsure about St Zotique or St Telesphore, though.)

Expand full comment
Michele Mandrioli's avatar

I thought it was strange that my husband pronounced "Toronto" as "Tranna". Now I understand!

Expand full comment
Kim Nesvig's avatar

Recent advances in neurology and genetics have revealed that around the same time that Homo Sapiens domesticated dogs (hogs, cows, chicken and horses), cats domesticated Homo Sapiens.

Expand full comment
Majik's avatar

I awoke from a worrisome slumber a half hour before the alarm on my phone went off and sitting up in bed with my feet already on the floor, I read this by the light of my phone alone even before I read my Bible. I can't say why, but it gave me hope. You gave me hope. Thank you . . . grrr, rrrfff.

Then I got up and peed a little bit on the bathroom floor.

Expand full comment
Timothy H Corrigan's avatar

The wife puts the Bible in hand, you drible on the floor, she puts the lid down, you leave it up, she snatches the pretzels and beer from you, you hug her in the middle of the cold night, she awakes in the morning with softened edges...the working of a divine plan, I suppose.

Expand full comment
wOKeBoomer's avatar

Stealing that last line, “…you hug her..she awakes ..softened edges.”

Expand full comment
george  campbell's avatar

see you at the next HUMANs therapy session .

Expand full comment
Lawrence Phillips's avatar

This comment is a tangent on drinking varnish remover. Anybody ever had black walnut wine? Tastes like what I would imagine varnish remover would taste like.

Expand full comment
Maria Jette's avatar

Haven’t had that, but I *have* had grappa, the flavor of which some longago wag described perfectly to me as “raisins soaked in turpentine.”

Expand full comment
Garrison Keillor's avatar

The old blues line goes "Going where the water tastes like wine, this Missouri water tastes like tturpentine."

Expand full comment
Nancy Fischer's avatar

Nope, not going to buy it. I am a woman. Also, I don’t believe the coyote story.

Expand full comment
Joe Furlan's avatar

Enjoyed this after getting on-line after a power outage. Thanks!

Expand full comment
Glenn Vanstrum's avatar

Good one, Mowgli, er, GK.

Expand full comment
folsomdon's avatar

Sorry, there are no good or bad limericks Only memorable limericks. The only limerick I know, and remember, was written on a (public toilet) wall circa 1949. And goes: "There once was a young couple named Kelly. Who were found stuck belly to belly. In their sexual haste, they used library paste. Instead of petroleum jelly." BTW, enjoyed the Sacto show, third row, 'Our Lady...' shirt. However, remembering lyrics of long-ago is quite taxing. Oops...there might be a limerick in that. PAX VOBISCUM don anderson, Folsom

Expand full comment
Marijo Hoffmann's avatar

You were especially fanciful today. It was a real treat. Keep it up!

Expand full comment
Charles Cox's avatar

Your most delightful and funny column of the year! Thanks!

Expand full comment
7thSignSoul's avatar

Where the heck is the audio of that Garrison Keillor Voice ❓😢

Expand full comment
Ruben Bix's avatar

Romulous and Remus were raised by wolves and later founded Rome. The limerick about the lady who drank varnish remover was amusing, but I think the coyotes must be a little disappointed.

Expand full comment