15 Comments

There used to be an office machine museum in Kansas City. I thought it was a real treasure but I gather it had limited appeal.

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There's a telephone museum in Nrw Hampshire.

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Did they have sample mimeograph fluid for everyone to huff?

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Garrison- to me- this is you at your best- and that is pretty damn good!

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During my career as a clinical scientist at a local hospital, we had mandatory quarterly department meetings to inform staff and clear the air on current laboratory issues. As you mentioned in the column of 10/6/21, not much happened and that was generally all right.

The only really notable meeting that I attended happened around the fall of 2010. It was the time the hospital administration and board of directors had bought into Elizabeth Holmes’ fantasy of Theranos. The lab group meeting was with the corporation’s director of laboratories. She wasn’t a medical director, only a corporate director. Her attention is costs and revenue in the laboratory department.

The Theranos analyzing system seemed like a huge windfall to her. The multimillion costs of running a clinical laboratory for a hospital system were a huge expense. To replace the testing equipment and the professional staff to run and maintain this would be a huge saving to the hospital and to medical expenses in general.

The director's first statement at this meeting to the lab staff was “Think about a second career.” “In a very short time, your positions will be eliminated” There was no mincing of words or any support. We all stared at each other. I think someone said, “What?” What a callous way to declare that all your study and dedication to your science was all for not. Being replaced by a box the size of a bread-making machine. The director had gone through the same schooling and training that we all had to be competent and service the community as laboratory professionals. She had gone back to school to obtain a master's in science to qualify as a director. She had just discounted all our efforts in a couple of short sentences. It was quite a slap.

Ahh, but the worm turns in this tale. The hospital’s chief officers started to have plans to affiliate with local pharmacies and retailers to establish a web of local accessible “Health centers” run by trained medical assistants to procure patient specimens and perform lab tests for a whole lot less cost. The people in the hospital laboratory would just have to find jobs in real estate or lawn care and snow removal business. So we waited for our layoff slips to arrive.

Then came the crack in the dam in 2015 where stories and federal investigations into problems were reported by insiders about the authenticity and accuracy of this miracle of technology and cost-saving device. By June 2018, Elizabeth Holmes with her Chief Operating Officer had been indicted by a federal grand jury and her corporation and machine had been seized from their control.

It was the walk back of statements by the corporate directors that would have been most appreciated but that never happened. The woman who declared our professional demise was reassigned to a subordinate position and she only appeared at a few meetings not to really have much to say. She retired soon after. I wasn’t invited to her retirement party.

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I too worked in offices for decades. I spent a lot of that time longing to be elsewhere, dreaming about other lives I could have lived. I never thought I would say it, but, I miss being in an office too. The routine, the equipment, the roles, the ceremonies, the interpersonal dramas that played out over time. In the words of Joni Mitchell, "You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone."

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Self employed independent business person for 45 years. I've never been in a meeting. The idea always fascinated me. Meetings. Where people gather, stuff is decided and then people depart to make it happen. What an interesting idea.

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Sure do miss that window in my office... And I remember, long, long ago, the smell of the chemicals we used on the Gestetner...the copy machine.

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The window of my first office had a beautiful view of classical academic architecture, steepled brick castles, Greek temples and all, but the ruling bureaucracy was all about seniority and the result was permanent stasis. So I left, gladly, in favor of open vistas and freedom.

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Well, I do enjoy the beautiful view I have now from my garage. I look out on (often) clear skies, wonderful trees, and neighbors houses...folks I've known now, some for 40 years or more...some newcomers. Anchorage is a political mud swamp, but a physical delight.

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Ah! The Accessible Star! When you write about your office here, I remember being there! It was a weekend special for "Out-of-State" Prairie Home Companion guests. We came, as I recall, from 36 states. We got to cruise on a Mississippi Riverboat, to attend an outdoor picnic on the street next to the Fitzgerald Theater, to luxuriate in actually being part of the audience for the Saturday night show, and to have an "In House" tour of your wonderful home, which sat overlooking the Mississippi River! As I recall, your "office" was really a place where you could work - lots of shelves of books, all within reach, a good-sized desk, and window-glass doors to both "riverside" and "street side." In the living room, there was a very comforting saying about "Home" (I'm drawing a blank there), comfortable sofa and chairs for the cast to sit around in after the show and remember their favorite parts.

As I sat on the couch for a few minutes, it occurred to me that you're just as "comfortable" a host in your own home, as you are on air! That's so reassuring, so "anti-Hollywood" in its image! I doubt if even 10% of "Stars" with listener ships as wide as yours, are as accessible to their audience as you have been! Even now, through the miracle of the Internet, you are approachable for us in a way that I doubt many other stars of your quality would be open to! Three Cheers For our Welcoming Host!

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“Five-line limericks” - is that not tautologous? A limerick of less than five lines/Seldom will flourish sublime/And should it have six/That’s a new box of tricks/But probably poetic crime.

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Some poets are lucky enough to get to a non-office life. Today is the anniversary of Edgar Allan Poe's death at age 40. A tribute poem to him:

https://thebickerstaffblog.blogspot.com/2021/10/edgar-allan-poe.html

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Old cafes and meeting with buddies are better than psychoshrinks. Old guys and gals to hang out with are best when listened to lightly and easy, especially here in the South. If you're ever Down South, I'll meet you at the Bluff Park Diner to listen, and then chat you up in slow Southernese!

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The great old Lafayette, Ind. Journal Courier editor Bob Kreibel used to give this highest compliment to about just about anything including this column, "Not all that bad."

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