39 Comments

Oh garrison! I love you! ❤️ You make me laugh! Karen. The « réal » karen.

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GK: like sunshine after rain. Thank you!

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Love the metaphor and the final touch of the iron mask. Who would be a fool enough to lick a frozen pump handle? I think I know several people who are tempted just off hand.

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Yes. These days there seem to be plenty of people out there who think they could master the pump handle and brag about it. That’s all they do though is talk tough.

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Unfortunately, this pseudo-tough stance is affecting my welfare. We have to be a consolidated front of non-pump-handle-lickers and practice what is good for the whole. This individualism and smarter than thou personal freedom crap is getting us deeper into our abyss. Sport teams only are victorious when all members play as one. Come on people, let us “Win one for the Gipper”.

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Exactly! One person doesn’t win a game. It’s the whole team. True.

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A cousin of mine, a farm boy, on a bitterly cold winter morning dare from his older brother, put his tongue on an electrified barbed-wire fence and it froze and he tore some skin off his tongue. He grew up, became a teacher, raised a family, did good works, and never put his tongue on a frozen electrical fence ever again. There is a lesson here. Do stupid things when you're a kid and get them out of the way.

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Popular parenting advice has reversed this...every child is protected from idiocies so we can have everyone grow to adulthood and THEN be idiotic. The most protected, and therefore most likely to become idiots, have a clear professional path...politics.

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You forgot the most popular *stupid thing* re: electric fences, i.e., the old micturate upon the electric fence.

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That’s what we got the townies to do!

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"Get your mind off wintertime, you ain't goin' nowhere...."

Something we used to sing around the wood stove in the winters here on Mt. Hood when we were newlyweds and all our hippie friends would ski over to our funky little house.

I always referred to it as the "January State of Mind."

And now I'm thanking my God you are visiting me this early dark morning.

My hubby can hear me laugh from the bedroom as I read your advice about icy handles—

and don't forget aluminum screen doors!

Keep sending those reminders, Mister K.

It thaws the ice!

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I grew up in a small town in Minnesota and the rules were simple: don’t lick the pump handle ( although I always was tempted by the frost on the inside of the windows), don’t eat yellow snow, put your sled away n the garage you won’t find tell spring if you leave it out.

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Hilarious! Why do northern mothers even issue such advice? MY Maine mother told me not to lick doorknobs. Who licks doorknobs and pump handles in any weather?? Curious or rebellious I tried and still remember the feel. I was a dumb kid…..

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I'm not sure, but I think someone was just shaking a disapproving finger at me. Be that as it may <whatever>.....

It is my tongue and I'll do as I please with it. However, growing up in a sensible common sense "think for yourself", "If Johnny jumps off the bridge are you going to also?" household, I can assure you I'm quite certain my only interest in what Johnny does is for pure entertainment. To each his own, you do your thing, I'll do mine.

Though you and my bride share a fondness for wearing pajamas all day long, I'll not stay inside in January or any other month for that matter, I got things to do and so do you. Fresh air cures a lot of things, though I can't as much for Johnny.

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Thank you for making me laugh on a cold, gray morning!

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Oh, don’t we all do stupid things as kids and as adults, too. But how else do we learn to become wise? Garrison probably thinks we are going off on a tangent here, but it’s true that we all do things that we learn from.

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Good judgement comes from experience and doing stupid things is an experience that may lead to good judgment. At least, in my case, I hope so. I mean, I am 79.

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Oh, And we know you are a Wise Man because you have what so few have….

Compassion.

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Stop the hate for Florida, please. But wait, maybe you do a good thing. So many people are moving here, the telephone co. Is starting to add new area codes. Rant on.

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Oh, my gosh, I laughed. Yes, long evenings of blankets and snuggles with my Beloved, and random conversations about everything!. Thank you.

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As I was reading this, I got a bloody nose. I don’t think the one caused the other, so don’t worry; I am not a litigious sort, and in my life I think I’ve already done all the lying to myself I’m going to do. That is why it’s been pretty easy to accept the results of the 2020 election, but I can’t help wondering about all those people who seem to not. Any suggestions for how to live in this country with them?

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I cherish your writing.

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I tried the tongue thing on our merry-go-round at school. Ouch! (I did survive.)

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Your #'s 1-4 list managed to encapsulate the current societal condition perfectly...something for everyone.

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Enough good laughs to start my get up and go this morning!

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